Love is the one thing we all search for, knowingly or not, yet it is the one thing in this life that cannot be found because it finds us. Love comes in many different forms and shapes. The one true love, the sole mate is a concept I have heard many a couple and single person talk about.
Puppy love: Loving someone for certain aspects of them and wanting them to mean more to you than they really do. Holding on to memories of the past in hopes it will create a future. Overall, loving someone before you even have an idea of who you really are or creating a love in your head when in reality there is no deep love there.
Real Love: Growing in your love together and becoming one while still maintaining your own identities. Accepting each other for your good and bad traits. Friendship. Honesty. Loyalty. Trust. Respect. These are the foundations of real love and without them, a relationship may survive but will always be on shaky ground.
We, as humans, need love. The problem is that we will sometimes grasp onto tiny bits of affection, especially when we are lonely, and weave it into some great love in our heads. We get so caught up in this disillusion of “love” that we create it with people that we are not even truly in love with. If we really want to convince ourselves of something, our minds will go along with it, knowing all along in the very back of our minds that it isn’t true, but clinging onto every small gesture and making it into something it is not. If you are in love, you are in love. It just is. right or wrong.
Have you ever tried to explain to someone why you like a certain food or flavor that they despise and you find yourself at a loss of expressive enough words to describe them of the flavor that you taste in that particular food? As you sit there trying to explain to them how great this food is, you decide to give up and realize that you must just have different tastes. This too is how true love is, there is no explanation for it, it just IS.
Now, I could sit here and tell you all the wonderful reasons I love my husband but I can’t explain to you the feeling I got when I knew I loved him and that he was the “one”, other than to tell you that it was a calm, matter-of-fact feeling and I didn’t hesitate, over analyze it (as in my nature to do so) or ask my friends’ opinions. I just knew.
My advice is when searching for love, stop. Love yourself first. Love is the one thing that we all search for and is the one thing that can not be found because it finds us.
– Side note: tomorrow is our 11th wedding anniversary- 🙂